When helping someone causes you both harm may sound like a strange or even a provocative statement. How on earth can helping someone cause you both harm?
We all have something to give that is better suited to some than to others.
A few years ago I was working with a wonderful Reiki practitioner. She was extremely talented, kind and her knowledge and intuition were second to none. I always felt extremely safe when we worked together. One session she shared something that has still stuck with me. She explained that she had felt unsafe working with someone in the past and had declined to work with him. She went on to say that if only she had been a better person and Reiki Master she might have been able to have worked with him.
This statement has never left me. It percolated away for weeks in my thoughts and subconscious. How could such a wonderful person and talented and caring Reiki Master have felt this? Surely her actions were appropriate for her at that time and place.
As lightworkers (What Is A Lightworker?), we are often told or feel an expectation placed upon us to help as many beings as possible and in as many ways. It is usually expected that lightworkers must put others needs before theirs (What Box Are You In?). While there indeed are times that this will be so, it does not mean you should give of yourself without any thought in every situation and certainly not against your intuition. I do need to mention that there are times that assistance is vital and necessary from medical or caregivers where someone is in danger of harming themselves or others.
When Helping Someone Causes You Both Harm
We are all able to help and assist in a unique way as we are individuals who are a reflection of a unique aspect of the universe. We all have something different to offer that no one else can do. We all have something to give that is better suited to some than to others. When we force ourselves to assist or work with someone that we do not feel we should or indeed can, we prevent that person from finding what it is they need. A distraction is created that may have consequences for the person you so dearly want to help such as being unable to move forward or perhaps even take another path that takes them away from their purpose. By forcing yourself to help someone you may inadvertently cause suffering for the person you want to assist.
There are also potential energetic consequences for you. When you choose not to listen to your intuition, you may be placing yourself in situations that are not safe (your safety is none negotiable) or appropriate. There are also potential energetic consequences such as the creation of spiritual stagnation. Spiritual stagnation is where you do not grow from your experiences, in this case from the experience of not working or assisting someone.
When we feel, we must and do work with everyone, and in all situations, despite our intuition telling us otherwise, you may be falling foul of your ego (What Is The Ego?). When the ego steps in you may feel needed. You may start to feel you have a say in your local and wider healing communities. However, when you begin to believe that you have reached the top of your game, you stop growing and discovering. When this happens you cut yourself off from the universe, which leaves you needing energy. More often than not this energy will be taken from the very people you are assisting.
Feeling like you should work with everyone and ignoring your intuition may not only harm the person you want to help but, it also harms you.
You strengthen your practice when you speak your truth, listen to your intuition and above all keep growing and discovering the unlimited unknowns in this beautiful universe of yours. The old saying that you can only be there for others when you are there for yourself first seems to be very true indeed.